Teachers' Day

My pupils were very sweet. They planned a party for me and gave me a surprise on 31 Aug 2009. With all the windows shut and lights off, I walked into the classroom and all of them surprised me with greetings and of course some really loud 'explosions'. The day went by with some work done in class and some celebration. They surrounded me and drowned me with all their gifts. I was touched. They were like my 'children' cuddling up with me. That feeling could not be described. I felt loved and happy.

Back home, I took out their gifts one by one and studied them. Some of them gave me handmade things such as artwork and cards. Some of them spent their money on gifts bought from the gift shop. I was praying that they had not spent too much money. As I went through the gifts, what really made me cry was the honest thoughts inscribed on the simple cards. They thanked me for what I have done for them and they told me that they understood why I scolded them. There is this girl who wrote to me in Mandarin. She is a very quiet student and she does not say much. Sometimes, I also wonder what goes on in her mind. But her letter to me was very simple and straightforward. She conveyed her thoughts to me through the beauty of words and she made something very simple for me. I can imagine her at home, sitting at her table, putting in all her efforts to ensure that there is no error and everything is as perfect as can be. That thought tugged at my heartstrings and I was simply too happy for words.

I am not perfect. There were times when I had made mistakes too. Yet, these children's affections for me makes me feel guilty because my expectations for myself are so high that I have not reached them yet. But these children accept me for who I am. As much as they do bring anxiety and stress into my life, they also bring that sense of joy the whole time.

That is why I sometimes feel that society is too harsh on these children. They are innocent. Yet, with the progress of the world today, they have to be subjected to the harsh dynamics of the environment. In order to protect them, I need to raise their awareness and get them to develop skills for survival but this is not easy. We need 2 hands to clap together with other external factors, which are often contradicting.

Still, I know that the present will be memories for me. When I am on my deathbed, the memories will flash in my mind before I find my way to God.

Teachers' day is also a day related to Matt. Without Matt by my side and supporting me, I do not think that I can make it. As I have told him, he is my guardian angel who has been guiding me all these years. All my blessings now, are given by God, and Matt is one of them. This, I will never ever forget, even if I lose my memory one day.