Tears of Joy....or for some.....sadness

The PSLE results were released today. As usual, it was customary for the P to address the crowd with the analysis of the year's results. Overall, we have done well. As the pupils were getting their results, we can see them streaming away from the teacher's table. Some had smiles on their faces and some had tears streaming down their faces. Whatever it is, the pupils have crossed the first hurdle in the Singapore context. As the pupils were walking away from the table, I felt that somehow, they were also walking away from us teachers. We know that they will go on to pursue their goals and interests. At the same time, I will also miss them. I may not be their form teacher. I may not have had many opportunities to interact with them other then music lessons. But I sure do miss them. A few of the naughty and active ones.

Oh Lord, please bless these children and grant them the wisdom to make wise decisions as they move on to other challenging aspects of their lives. Please guide them and show them the way to happiness, joy and belief in you.

Thank you, Lord. Amen.

Mixed emotions......

The concert was finally over. Everything disappeared so fast. THe children went hoome with their parents. Teachers who have family commitments left soon after. I stayed back for some food and walked around school. Most corners and places in the school were dark as the cleaners and caretakers have switched off the lights and cleaned up the mess.

THe focus and appreciation of hard work was given to Shawn, the main coordinator. I slipped away quietly.

Emotions were mixed. I could feel that some of the Primary 6s were beginning to miss the school. I could see it from their faces. The sadness, the tears..... I cried too, for I knew that I would miss some of them. I know that they cannot bear to leave the school which has been their home or second home for the first six years of their education.

I wonder. If they would ever remember me, a teacher who has just joined and who is still trying to find ways to shape their thoughts and behaviour.

Very soon, things would go back to normal. As if the concert and tears did not take place at all. This is the harsh reality of life. We lose things that we cherish very quickly. Am I strong enough to manage this? I have no idea. After sleeping for one whole day to recuperate from the past one month of tiring rehearsals, things are simply beginning to settle down.

Again, I try to comfort and console myself that I am there to create memories for them. I should learn to manage my emotions.....

Emotions running high.....

Today is the last day of school and we are having our Annual Prize Presentation Ceremony. ANd of course, along with a ceremony, there will be a school musical production put up. I have shadowed Shawn since the rehearsals started. The rehearsals have been tiring and stressful having to get everyone to be observant and also play their part to the best that they could.

Finally, after such a gruelling time, they have managed to put the pieces together. Emotions ran high today as Harvey tried to contain his emotions and read his lines. I guess he has a much higher level of committment towards the school and his CCA groups. He takes the initiative to organize and get things done. He wants his friends and team-mates to be the best that they could be.

One by one, the pupils started to tear as the harsh reality sets in. Last day of school, last group performance, last day on the stage of the school. Shawn could not help himself too. His last musical production. Shawn has watched some of the students grow up. Now that he is leaving, the love and care that he has for the little ones simply overflow and perhaps overwhelm him.

Perhaps this is what i am here for, to help create memories for the little ones. So that years later, as they look back, they can say that they have lived their lives fully.

Thank you Lord, for everything that you have given us. Teach us to be thankful. Teach us how to love and cherish one another.

In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, Amen.

Feeling upset.....

Today, I was very fierce to the Pri 1s. I wonder if I had gone overboard. I hope that I have not offended Mrs Peters. I was just trying to get the kids organised. I hope that she will not take it to heart. Perhaps I should have lowered my expectations. They are only p1s. They do not really know what to do when their teacher is not around. Oh God. PLease forgive me. I am really sorry.

Joy.....God's Blessings

I was so happy and filled with tears on joy on Tuesday night. After so much delay, I finally got down to calculate the marks for my Foundation Science class. This is the first time they are being tested for Science. Science has always been a non-examinable subject for them . I only taught them for one semester. So in a way, my expectations of their performance were not that high.

I was so excited and thankful....about one-third of them passed the paper and one of them even scored more than seventy marks. I cannot wait to release the results to them but I am now sick at home. I am sure they must also be very upset that I was not able to see them in school today. Or, perhaps that is part of my wishful thinking.....

I see many of them trying very hard. They have a clearer picture and a high level of self-awareness of reality and the challenges in life. Although they do not have a bed of roses to lie on, they have a strong and positive outlook. No matter how hard life is now, they face it with a smile and that sense of hope.

I am inspired by them. Honestly. They are very brave children. They may not have a headstart now. But I know that they will go on to lead meaningful and fulfilling lives in the days to come.

Dear Lord,

thank you for everything so far. Work has been hard and tiring. My health is also being challengd. But I know that all that I am doing now allows the children to move ahead and explore the many mysteries and marvels in life. I pray for strength, perseverance, wisdom and guidance from you Lord, so that I may do your work and give you glory and praise. Please continue to guide me and walk with me, for you are my saviour and light.

In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, Amen.